We Said Forever Read online

  Table of Contents

  We Said Forever

  Copyright

  Extras

  We Said Forever

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Chapter 36

  Chapter 37

  Chapter 38

  Chapter 39

  Chapter 40

  Chapter 41

  Chapter 42

  Chapter 43

  Chapter 44

  Chapter 45

  Chapter 46

  Epilogue

  Acknowledgements

  More Than a Memory

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  More From Marie James

  We Said Forever

  Marie James

  Copyright

  We Said Forever

  Copyright © 2017 Marie James

  Editing by Word Nerd Editing

  EBooks are not transferrable. All rights are reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. The unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this copyrighted work is illegal. No part of this book may be scanned, uploaded, or distributed via the Internet or any other means, electronic or print, without the publisher’s permission.

  This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the writer’s imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locale, or organizations is entirely coincidental.

  Extras

  Cover Design by TE Black

  Cover Photo: Adobe Stock

  We Said Forever Playlist:

  Spotify Link: https://goo.gl/mU04ls

  Songs:

  Seein’ Red-Dustin Lynch

  You Promised-Brantley Gilbert

  The Best of Me-Brantley Gilbert

  Fall Into Me-Brantley Gilbert

  Saving Amy-Brantley Gilbert

  You Don’t Know Her Like I Do-Brantley Gilbert

  Stone Cold Sober-Brantley Gilbert

  Look at What I’ve Done-Chris Cagle

  I’d Be Lying-Chris Cagle

  What We Ain’t Got-Jake Owen

  Who I Am With You-Chris Young

  Used To Love You Sober-Kane Brown

  Your Side Of The Bed-Little Big Town

  UnLove You-Jennifer Nettles

  Keep You-Sugarland

  Wanted You More-Lady A

  Stay-Florida Georgia Line

  Wasting All These Tears-Cassadee Pope

  I Wish I Could Break Your Heart-Cassadee Pope

  Should’ve Been Us-Tori Kelly

  Burning House-Cam

  Staying’s Worse Than Leaving-Sunny Sweeney

  Record Year-Eric Church

  If I Told You-Darius Rucker

  Sober Saturday Night-Chris Young

  Just Keep Breathing-We The Kings

  You Heard Wrong-Dylan Schneider

  Drunk Enough-Angels Fall

  Now That I Know Your Name-Jordan Rager

  Stupid Girl-Jennifer Nettles

  The Long Goodbye-Brooks & Dunn

  I Can’t Love You Anymore-Gary Nichols

  Like I Loved You-Brett Young

  Fallout-Mariana’s Trench

  Fight With-Carter Winter

  HOLY-Florida Georgia Line

  Better Man-Little Big Town

  Don’t Let Me Down-The Chainsmokers

  How Not To-Dan & Shay

  We Said Forever

  Rock bottom.

  They say the only way to go from there is up, but what is “up” when you’re born into someone else’s rock bottom?

  At ten, football became my first love. It’s what got me out of the house away from my self-destructive family. My love for football landed me at Las Vegas University with a full ride scholarship, and the orange on my jersey was my favorite color…until my eyes landed on the red dress Fallyn wore the night we met.

  At twenty-one, I jumped off the cliff into the unknown the second Fallyn McIntyre danced in my arms at a party. I had the greatest girl in the world and the opportunity to play college ball every Saturday. My rock bottom was looking up, thanks to my two first loves.

  Parties, sex, and football—life was perfect. But one drink too many, and my world came crashing down. When I chose pills over my second love, my head told me it was the best decision I ever made. The pills keep me warm and protect me from the distance Fallyn created. Percs don’t judge me. They make me feel alive.

  Threes.

  They say the best things come in threes, but one leads to a stable future, one is my salvation, and the other drags me to hell—a hell I’d willingly burn in for eternity…if it weren’t for my second love.

  Prologue

  The stagnant, filthy air of the one bedroom apartment stings my nose as I make my way down the short hall to the living room. The worn, tamped down carpet sticks to the soles of my shoes, the years of built up grime well past the point of being able to be cleaned.

  My stomach roils in disgust, the shame of where I live and what I deal with daily sitting heavy in my empty gut. A familiar buzz surrounds me, and I swat at the fly permeating my space—one of God knows how many. My gaze darts to the couch, and true to form, my mother is passed out, a rubber band around her arm and needle sticking out of her vein. I drag my hands through my hair as a sigh bursts from my lips. Exasperation, desperation, disgust—it lands straight in my sour stomach. She couldn’t even be bothered to pull the frequently used hypodermic needle out of her arm before passing out. Closing my eyes, I pinch the outer shell of the needle with sure fingers, tug it free of her arm, and place it next to the empty baggie and heroin residue on the weathered piece of wood that’s served as the coffee table for as long as I can remember.

  Muscle memory is all that’s involved as I grab the tattered blanket from the end of the couch and pull it over her sleeping form, her chest rising and falling with each shallow breath. Gooseflesh is already visible on Mom’s skin—a surefire sign she’s coming down from her high. Helping her isn’t out of love, but a sense of survival, self-preservation. Waking up warm decreases the chance of an altercation when I get home from school this afternoon.

  I used to love my mother—years ago, when alcohol was the only thing she needed to get through the day, when she used words rather than her fists. Taking care of Mom always allows thoughts of my deadbeat father to trickle in—the man who ruined my once loving mother when I was eight. One tiny bag of chunky brown powder was all it took for my mother to turn from a semi-functioning alcoholic to a full-blown heroin addict. He got her high, beat her bloody, and left like he always does. I took care of her when he deserted us again. I held her to my chest and begged her never to do it again as her stomach emptied on my clothes. She promised me she
’d stop it all. No more drinking, no more drugs, no more Dad.

  Those promises lasted as long as the high did. Six hours later, she was gone, looking for her next fix. That was four years ago, and every day since has gotten progressively worse.

  I shake my head, trying to rid my thoughts of the failure my parents saddled me with as I walk out of the apartment. Pulling the broken door closed is the best I can do. The lock and door jamb were busted long ago, but that’s what happens when a drug dealer comes around looking for payment. Sometimes she’s able to trade with stolen goods or cash, but most often, she settles her debts on her back—another thing a twelve-year-old boy should never have to see when coming home from school.

  Tears sting the backs of my eyes. One minute—that’s all I ever give myself for self-pity each day. For sixty seconds, I allow myself to wish things were different while cursing God for giving me this life.

  I hitch my backpack farther up on my shoulder, the weight of my football uniform and second-hand cleats a welcome distraction. Football is my escape. The smell of the grass, the thud of shoulder pads as they collide, the sound of Coach’s whistle when we can do better…all of it helps me clear my head—helps me keep hope alive that one day my life will be different.

  “If you don’t like it, change it.” Coach’s words, his mantra, echo in my head as I take the three flights of stairs to the ground level. I hold my head high as I walk out of the apartment building in ratty clothes. There’s something to be said about living and surviving a childhood in East Las Vegas. Not many people know some of the worst neighborhoods in Sin City, even competing with the ganglands of Los Angeles, are a mere ten miles from where millions of people vacation each year. Unbelievable to many, but true nonetheless. Mention the area surrounding UMC Hospital to anyone from around here and wait for the crinkle of their noses—it’s inevitable.

  This may be my life now, but there is nothing about this situation that will be involved in my future. I look up at the sky—blue, cloudless, much like my destiny.

  Chapter 1

  Fallyn

  “No freaking way.” I cringe at myself, then look over my shoulder at Charity’s reflection in my mirror. Familiar narcissistic emotions tingle at the edge of my subconscious. I despise the awareness after it’s been dormant for years.

  “You look hot,” she cajoles as her hands swipe down the front of her equally ridiculous dress.

  “Where in the world did you even find clothes like this?” I tug at the bottom hem of the micro-mini, only to have a nipple pop out from the top. If the length of the dress doesn’t scream slutty, the red, shimmery fabric ensures everyone who sees it will think just that.

  “From that novelty store near Excalibur.”

  I glare at her in the mirror. “That’s not a novelty shop, Charity. It’s a damn sex toy shop.”

  She shrugs, pushing me out of her way so she can apply the fourth layer of lipstick to her already bright red lips. “Semantics. This party is a big deal,” she assures me.

  “For you, maybe. You know parties don’t interest me at all.” I’ve managed to separate myself from the college party scene the last two and a half years, sans one other, which cemented the notion that I don’t belong in that world. Why I relented tonight, I’ll never know. I give up on stretching the dress and pull on my favorite denim jacket. At least I won’t be flashing everyone my breasts the second we arrive. I can’t say the same about my ass.

  “The Tigers will be there—all of them,” she explains, referring to the players for the Las Vegas University football team. “It’s the weekend before the Championship game, so the house is going to be filled with them!”

  Her excitement over possibly scoring with a college-level football player is almost admirable. Almost.

  “I don’t know a damn thing about sports. I won’t fit in.” I don’t want to fit in.

  She narrows her eyes at me, and she chuffs an indignant laugh. “I know for a fact you give zero fucks about fitting in. It’ll be fun, I promise. You’ll regret not going. Plus, football players just mean hot, sexy, incredibly fit guys, which honestly has nothing to do with sports.”

  “Tons of fun,” I snipe, walking out of the cramped bathroom in our off-campus apartment. “Just what I need, egocentric, self-serving jocks who think they’re God’s gift to every woman.”

  I stop long enough to grab my purse from the table and walk out the door, Charity on my heels. The energy radiating from her is palpable. The girl acts as if this is the very first party she’s gone to with football players in attendance. How easily she forgot the party after the first game of the season and the player who told her to “get fucked”—his words, not mine. At least she’s resilient. My plans for tonight include drinking water and blending into the wall until she’s so wasted and rejected, she begs me to get her home, just like the one and only other party she convinced me to attend last fall.

  I glance down at the time on my cell phone as we huddle together in the brisk January air calculating how long it will be before I can crawl back into my warm bed.

  “At least pretend to be excited,” she chastises with a quick shake of my shoulders. “It’s New Year’s Eve, Fallyn, second semester of your junior year. Eventually, you’re going to have to act like a damn college student.”

  I nod, my lips clamped in a thin line. “Right. College student. Getting messed up and sleeping with random guys—”

  The smile on her face halts my words. “Exactly,” she mouths.

  I watch the puff of warm air mix with the cold around us until it dissipates completely. “Why don’t I just skip the trip to the free clinic next week by going back inside and watching the damn ball drop on TV? It’s nearly midnight on the east coast, so I could be in bed within the hour.”

  “Unbelievable,” she mutters as the cab pulls up to the curb. She shoves me into the back and climbs in behind me, giving the driver the address to a house on the other side of campus.

  I regret agreeing to do this as much as I’m going to regret the blisters I’ll have on my feet from these ridiculous shoes and the frost bite that will cover more than half my body when I wake up tomorrow. What a way to start the New Year.

  ***

  My head pounds in rhythm to the beat the DJ seems to have on repeat. I ignore the catcalls and wandering eyes of the beyond drunk people surrounding me. Safely tucked into the corner of the room with my back against the wall, I contemplate using drunken college parties and the failure rate of students who attend as my thesis next year, but then I remind myself my degree is in marketing and that makes no damn sense.

  I look at my phone for the millionth time since arriving at this near orgy and realize it’s only been six minutes since the last time I looked at it. With a soundless sigh, I push myself off the wall and weave through the group of half-naked, gyrating bodies. My water bottle has been empty for the last forty-five minutes, and if I have any hope of surviving the humid air in the small living room, a refill is mandatory.

  “Orange,” I mutter, squeezing past a girl with her legs wrapped around a tall guy in a jersey. Her dress is to the point of indecent hanging around her hips as they dance together—and by dance, I mean practically have sex in front of a group of easily a hundred people.

  His jersey, her dress, and the tiny scrap of lace between the cheeks of her ass—all of it is orange. Welcome to an LVU party. Does anyone involved in picking colors for colleges even consider how hideous the color looks against tan skin and dark hair? Gag me. I’m drowning in it. Everywhere I turn, orange and white assaults my vision. School colors were the furthest thing from my mind when the college offered me a partial scholarship, and since I’m not one with very much school spirit, it wasn’t really an issue.

  Firm hands grab me as I attempt to squeeze through another clump of rotating hips and breathless, slutty moans.

  “No thanks,” I say without even looking over my shoulder, swatting at the unrelenting grip on my body.

  Turning to face the
guy who is either too stupid or too drunk to take a hint, my eyes land on the handsome face of a tall blond with the lightest blue eyes I’ve ever seen.

  The smirk on his face clearly indicates he believes I should be impressed. And I am. There’s no doubt about it. I’m completely fascinated by the ego this douchebag emits with one simple look. Without a word, I let my eyes trail from the top of his purposely mussed hair that probably took longer to fix than mine to the orange chucks adorning his big feet.

  He allows the perusal, awaiting my approval. Cocking an eyebrow at his blatant, pompous attitude, I push his hands off my hips.

  “Not a chance, buddy,” I say before turning back toward the kitchen.

  My legs tremble, wobbling on my already unsteady heels. I release a long, slow breath, hoping he disappeared into the crowd. The last thing I need is for him to notice the way my eyes lingered on his stubbled jaw and the muscles of his chest even his clothes can’t hide. I’m almost certain he could sense my quick, unmasked arousal. One look was all it took for this man to creep his way under my skin and throb in my core. He’s got self-entitled, bad boy, asshole written all over him—character traits I would have dropped anything for a few years ago. Not today, though. Those are flaws I left in Utah when I graduated high school.

  The same firm grip reaches for me again, wrapping all the way around my body and pulling my back against an incredibly strong chest.

  I close my eyes for a moment, allowing only a second of contact before turning around and readying my hand to slap him across the face for taking such liberties without my permission—just another alpha asshole attribute that used to make me swoon.

  “You need to get your—”

  His finger covers my lips, preventing me from getting my words out. My attempt at what I’m sure was going to be a very eloquent threat against his manhood falters as he pulls me closer to his body. His leg somehow finds its way between mine as he squats a couple inches to decrease the differences in our height.

  The steady hand that has reached for me twice tonight is around my back, fingers splayed against the thin red fabric. The finger that halted my words trails down the column of my damp neck before gripping around at my nape. Gooseflesh follows the trail, racing over my fevered skin. He holds me against him, guiding me to the rhythm I hated until this very second. Like the traitorous slut she is, my body molds against him, every soft inch against his hardness.